6.08.2008

Top 11 Worst Cell Phone Offenders, Are You One Of Them?

Top 11 Worst Cell Phone Offenders, Are You One Of Them?


Cell phones -- not since second-hand smoke has anything caused such consistent public outrage. But, unlike smoking, cell phones aren't typically life-threatening.

So why do we react so strongly when people use them in public?

Hmmm, could it be because cell phones tend to turn otherwise polite people into rude, self-absorbed oafs? Here are the 11 cell phone offenses that annoy us the most ... along with our recommended penalties.

Gadget Geek

Offense: Wearing two or more wireless devices on your belt at once -- especially ones that blink.

How Hot It Makes Us: Mild

Recommended Penalty: The snickers these nerds get behind their backs should be punishment enough.

Bluetooth Bozo

Offense: Wearing a hands-free headset when not actually talking on the phone. Are they trying to look important or do they just not have a better place to put it?

How Hot It Makes Us: Mild

Recommended Penalty: Scream "It's not 2005" into the bozo's free ear.

Ringtone Reject


Offense: Still thinking annoying ringtones are funny and repeatedly sharing this "hilarity" with everyone within hearing distance.

How Hot It Makes Us: Medium

Recommended Penalty: Stick the offender in a soundproof room and play a synthesized version of La Cucaracha over and over and over ...

Silent-Mode Slacker

Offense: Forgetting to turn the ringer off during public performances such as movies, concerts, church sermons, class lectures, weddings, funerals, office meetings, etc.

How Hot It Makes Us: Medium

Recommended Penalty: This guy has the right idea: Angry Professor Vs. Cell Phone.


Angry Professor vs. Cell Phone

Need we say more?

Public Space Invaders

Offense: Subjecting defenseless others to banal phone chatter in places they can not escape (e.g. public library, bus, gym).

How Hot It Makes Us: Medium

Recommended Penalty: If cell phone use is banned, alert an authority figure so they can kick 'em to the curb. If not, a dirty stare may not stop it, but it'll make you feel better.

Rebel Yeller


Offense: Speaking louder on the mobile than in person or on any other phone.

How Hot It Makes Us: Medium

Recommended Penalty: If the offender is simply not aware of his decibel level, a look and raised eyebrow may remind him to curb the volume. If not, join in. Clearly the offender wants to include everyone in the convo.

TMI Guy


Offense: Talking on the phone while in the middle of, well, um, doing "personal business."

How Hot It Makes Us: Medium

Recommended Penalty: Put the TMI Talker on speaker phone and take bets on how long he takes or play "guess the noise." Let him in on the fun when he's done.

Self Centered Shopper


Offense: Talking on the cell phone while placing an order or paying the cashier.

How Hot It Makes Us: Spicy

Recommended Penalty: Simply say "Let me know when you're ready," and skip over the offender to help the next person in line. If she gets annoyed, tell her you were taught not to interrupt someone while they are talking.

Social Snubber

Offense: Texting/talking on the cell phone when with someone else. Basically, the offender is telling the people he's with that they aren't as important as the person on the phone.

How Hot This Makes Us: Spicy

Recommended Penalty: Unless it's an emergency, tell the offender to reschedule when he's free and walk away.

Menacing Mobiler

Offense: Swearing, arguing or talking violently within hearing distance of kids and other sensitive ears.

How Hot It Makes Us: Super Spicy

Recommended Penalty: Handle this offender with care. Leave the area if possible. If not, let the authorities handle it. Don't risk your own safety just to make a point.

Motor Mouth

Offense: Dialing, texting, or engaging in phone chatter while driving.

How Hot It Makes Us: Blazin'

Recommended Penalty: This one is literally life or death -- so we recommend handing it off to the real law enforcers!

How to Handle Offenders

Here's how to stand up for yourself against cell phone offenders:

1. Keep Your Cool If you give the offender the benefit of the doubt, you're less likely to lose your temper.

2. Be Polite, Yet Powerful Speak your peace firmly, but without anger.

3. Watch Your Body Language Don't clench your teeth or wag your finger.

4. Let It Go Don't be a cell phone cop and take matters in your own hands. Walk away or find someone in a position of authority to address the situation.



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